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| Joke Name |
Dom Irrera: Friendly Medical Advice
You ever get sick and one of your friends gives you medical advice? And they tell you that they're not a doctor -- like you didn't know it? |
Dental Mental Hygienist
Q: What are dentists? |
Joke Written By and For Retards
Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm. His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to the hospital to get re-attached. The next day he goes to see his... |
Runny Noodle
This lady is on an airplane and is seated next to a man named Ian McKegney. About half an hour after they take off, Ian sneezed. He calmly opened his fly, took out his penis and wiped it with a handkerchief. The lady was shocked but a little too... |
Santa Singh
A GOOD ONE... enjoy. |
Jack Gallagher: Expert Medical Technical Terms
My wife was in labor for 30 hours. Then, at the end of that, she had a C-section. After 30 hours, the doctor said, 'Well, it looks like we have to go get him.' I guess we couldn't have done that yesterday? You know why they had to go get him? I'm... |
The Businessman's Medical Problem
A businessman returns from the far east. After a few days he notices stange growth on his penis. He sees several doctors. They all say: “You've been screwing around in the Far East, very common there, no cure. We'll have to cut it off.”... |
Headaches and Sex
A man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that the poor guy has tried practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. |
Jesse Joyce: Hot Medical Interns
I got some advice if there's any single dudes in the room. If you ever have to go in for surgery, for whatever reason, they want to put a lot of hot chicks involved in the surgery process. There's always, like, hot surgical interns running around,... |
Redneck's Medical Dictionary
Artery: Study of paintings |
Blonde's Appendicitis
A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis." |
Julian McCullough: Brain Can't Dream
Did you know that if you go to bed wasted, your brain can't dream? It's like a medical thing. I have my own theory and that's that your brain is like, 'Dude, I'm not going to entertain you after what you just did to me for the last six hours. Oh,... |
Medical Benefits
A lady shows up at her doctor's appointment. The doctor calls her name and says, "Will you please follow me?" |
Elderly Marriage and Medical Past
Two elderly folks in a nursing home wanted to get married. Their doctor took each one into his office separately to try and talk them out of it. |
The Lawyer Keeps His Promise
A dying man gives each of his best friends -- a lawyer, doctor and clergyman -- an envelope containing $25,000 in cash to be placed in his coffin. |
The Deacon's Last Words
A deacon is in the hospital and his good friend, a preacher, goes to visit him. |
Punk Rocker Gets Medical Message
A punk rocker with acute appendicitis needs immediate surgery. |
Wanda Sykes: Cutting Out Carbs
They mess with your food, they do. They go 'Well Wanda, first we're gonna cut out all your carbs...' OK, wait a minute, hold up. Let me explain something to you. I've got this medical condition, and when you cut out my carbs -- my foot? Right up your ass. |
Radical Procedure
After graduating from college, Joe was increasingly hampered by worse and worse headaches. By his 30th birthday, he decided to seek medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across a doctor who could... |
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